I'm making it a practice to re-post this frequently.
And it's been a while.
Its the most important contract I've ever written for myself.
And a promise I intend to keep.
We cannot be all things to all people, there are times
when we for sanity's sake have to pull back and self care.
Sometimes we do have to draw the line, or ask for a time out.
Why people react so strongly when we do is beyond me.
I suspect ego has much to do with it, and a need to control the outcome.
When we set a boundary, we remove that control as well as the outcome.
And it's been a while.
Its the most important contract I've ever written for myself.
And a promise I intend to keep.
We cannot be all things to all people, there are times
when we for sanity's sake have to pull back and self care.
Sometimes we do have to draw the line, or ask for a time out.
Why people react so strongly when we do is beyond me.
I suspect ego has much to do with it, and a need to control the outcome.
When we set a boundary, we remove that control as well as the outcome.
"When we set a boundary, we let go of the outcome."
The purpose of setting boundaries is to take care of our self. Being forced to learn how to set boundaries is a vital part of learning to own our self, of learning to respect ourselves, of learning to love ourselves. If we never have to set a boundary, then we will never get in touch with who we really are. ~Robert Burney
I will not apologize for setting my own personal boundaries.
I will not apologize for doing whatever it takes to enforce those boundaries.
I will not apologize for doing whatever it takes to protect my emotonal well being.
I will not apologize for keeping out those who are not healthy.
I will not apologize for taking time to think before I speak.
I will not apologize for telling someone their behavior is not acceptable to me.
I will not apologize for deciding what behavior is and is not acceptable.
I will not apologize for stepping back from a situation in order to evaluate my feelings, however long that takes.
I will not apologize for setting strict boundaries when I need and sticking to them.
I will not apologize for asking for space when I need it.
I will not apologize for taking responsibility for the way I allow others to treat me.
I will not apologize for cutting someone completely out of my life if I feel they don't respect my boundaries.
I will not apologize for not believing everything I'm told.
I will not apologize for letting your problems, your dysfunction be yours.
I will not apologize for not being able to be all things to all people.
I will not apologize for loving myself enough to set boundaries even if it means I risk losing people in my life because of them.
One Love. One Peace. Always and all ways.
4 comments:
I remember! It sank in then..It has sunk in now:)You are so photogenic .:)
I think I may have some way to go, especially where family are concerned, but I am so much better today than a year ago, so I am glad.
Nana..... : ) xo
Kim......it took me years.
I'm 46 and wrote this last year.
I'm still working it yanno?
Kim thank you for writing. : )
I like this manifesto.
Just sayin'....
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